lungs

the wall of machines behind me
beep-beeped with every skipped breath
a swallow or yawn sent an electronic chirp,
that grew more insistent
until i complied and in- or ex- haled.
They have given me a new lung and
a new level of resentment for noise

The human face -a lovely woman,  so young
so responsible and duty bound, with syringe and IV
tubes and charts she resets my path
to rest and morphine-sleep
as I close eyes
her loving dark eyes remind me--
you can see Angels  before you die.

Narco-dreams come with a buzzing ear
spots before my eyes and floaters,
the air is alive with motes and specks
so many little dark things
as the bright lights fade into hazy rings
i fall...

near a flame-red wall with steps of stone rising tall
above as far as only  i can see
the next landing and a fire bowl
whipped in the winds
i climb, as there is no choice
the wall comforts me against a fall
the wall now turns amber then gray
and red again as the fire bowl lights each etage
i look up and there is more of the wall
and more fire bowls-- the wall
grows like my fear and yet -- it calms me

Somewhere else some time other I lay in cold morning mists
a flat roof with thick ochre  cover
like skin, this warm clay
gathers sweat in the morning cool.
I am determined not to move
as the sun rises behind me and whisks water away--
the clay begins to dry then wither, and now ..it peels
Such quiet.. i don't breathe.. listening to the paint die
I hold my throat in  lock-- until
they beg me to exhale-- the noisy chorus rises unceasing
Chirp-chirp-chirps me back to breath.